Chez Rupert

Let me tell you a little about my house, which I have named Chez Rupert. My house is part of a historical building that was built a very long time ago, back before the invention of bees. Just kidding! But seriously, it is very old. So you must ring a buzzer and then open a door and then climb up some steps and knock on another door to get in. That is the Historical Way of building houses. Don't worry, it's still a house and not an apartment. Trust me, I know. Only rubes live in apartments.

I have two roommates, Mister B and Mizz W. Mister B likes to spend his time in the study reading and writing. If I could eat books, I would spend a long time in that study . . . and still come out with a bellyache and more than half the books to go. That's how many books he has.

Mizz W sleeps on me at night. She is very heavy. You will probably guess that she likes to eat a lot, but luckily she likes different food than me. I like sweet things, and she likes salty and fried things. Even the sweet things she likes have salt and oil in them, like chocolate croissants. Yuck! Well, at least I don't need to compete with her for food. A bear has enough problems in life without having to worry about roommates taking his food. For example, there is the problem of being nearly flattened every night by a very heavy, unconscious roommate. (Don't tell Mizz W, but I kind of like it.)

As roommates, I find them satisfactory. I can boss them around and order them to bring me honey, and then they do. They don't mind obeying me, because I am three and cute. This strikes me as a satisfactory arrangement.